Changing Habits with Love

Today is the first of May. It’s a beginning of another month and it feels so fresh and new.  Maybe you want to change something in your life out of love for yourself. If you feel you are thinking or doing things that do not serve you anymore but don’t know how to change, here are some tipps for you.

There is power in an easy flow of repeating actions. Patterns of thought and actions are changed by moment to moment decisions over and over again. The world is functioning on repeating patterns. Listen to the birds every morning before you get up or listen to your breath. Repeating patterns are life. Being aware of the constant flow which is all around you puts you in that flow. One of my favorite books is “Wealth Consciousness” by Roger G. Lanphear who gives simple practices to work with the flow of repeating actions.

When being aware of the life generating flow, identify what doesn’t feel like being in the flow in your life. First of all, don’t force anything to change. We want to feel free and the power to choose is our birthright. Allow yourself being where you are first.

Meditating is a good beginning for change. Sitting twice a day for 10 minutes and just being with yourself is such a lovely and caring thing to do. Your inner child will know that you love her or him and listen to her needs. She will know that you are working for yourself and not against yourself.

I love the 6 steps from the book “May Cause Miracles” by Gabby Bernstein. 

  1. I witness my fears
  2. I am willing to see this differently
  3. I choose to see this differently
  4. I am grateful
  5. I forgive
  6. I expect miracles

The first two steps alone are so great. You witness what you are doing and what doesn’t serve you with love. It’s not about changing all at once. Just get yourself to know a little bit better. We can only change what we know about. The second step is to be willing to change. This is a miracle itself. Many people don’t want to change although change is always possible. Gabby said in one of her talks only the two tools applied over and over again without knowing how to change yet will bring about change. Witnessing, willing, witnessing, willing. 

What I do when I am willing to change I usually pray and say: dear inner Self, I don’t know yet how to change but I trust you. Please guide me step by step. I’ll follow along. I’ll feel it in my heart when it’s a step into the right direction.

Choosing to see things differently is about gaining a new perspective. Maybe you learn more about what you want to change. Maybe you change your thought about something. Maybe you already change something.

For actually changing something I love the following three principles:

  • The 3 day rule: it takes three days to establish a new pattern; after the first three days it feels as if you have always done this the new way
  • The rule of abundance: let’s say you want to drop certain foods; focus on the new fun foods you want to eat instead and have plenty of them in your home
  • The rule of play: make it a fun and creative process; come up with new solutions, don’t take it so seriously if you fall back once in a while, it’s just a game and the day is still good even if you missed out one time; now you choose differently

Being grateful and appreciating what already works in your life or simply for being in the process opens your heart and puts you in your positive energy. It’s so much easier to make changes from a happy place.

When you say “I forgive” you can forgive yourself and others. I love the definition of forgiveness by Roger G. Lanphear. He says nothing we could do or anyone else could do would ever be able to harm our inner Self. Our essence is eternal and indestructible. Forgiving means, we are here “for giving love”. So if you are forgiving yourself you simply extend your love to yourself. If you are forgiving someone else you are tapping into your compassion and give the other person your love.

The last step is to expect miracles. Miracles are shifts in perception. Seeing things differently is a miracle already. Enjoy the blessings in your life by witnessing, willing, choosing, appreciating and forgiving moment for moment.

All Love,